Hailey makes a bride (Prelude)

Well, I read it in the Cosmo, right? If a girl hasn't had sex in six months, she's emotionally turned into a virgin.

Well then you're the kinkiest virgin I've ever met.

A girl can be kinky and a virgin at the same time. Is there something wrong with that?

And you've been dating this guy for six months and you haven't had sex yet.

Well, he's, you know, religious. I met him at church, you know.

What the hell were you doing at church?

The priest gave me 500 bucks to give him a fucking golden shot.

You're getting married to a churchgoer virgin and you're a lesbian.

I am not a lesbian. I'm sorry. I'm not a lesbian.

We just had sex last night.

That wasn't sex. That was, you know, foreplay.

You came eight times.

It was really good foreplay. It still doesn't make it sex.

Besides, I like guys and girls.

Louisa, Louisa, Louisa, this is never gonna work out.

You're a stripper, you're a *********, a porn star, a fucking bisexual maniac.

You're a slut.

Admit it, you're a lesbian.

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